I have never really given much thought to the fact that I use the internet and cable TV almost 10 hours a day. I just went about my day using the web for work, pleasure, and when I just needed to know something.

And when it comes to Cable TV and Tivo, it’s just part of my day, like eating, breathing, drinking water. Now being without the modern conveniences of the internet and cable, for 4 days so far, I am shocked at my level of addiction. At first I thought without web and TV I would read, or get cleaning done. But instead it has made me majorly depressed. I am a social media junkie for one thing. Using my Blackberry to do as much Twittering as I can is not cutting it, with my one bar of service from AT&T. I need my TweetDeck! I need to know what is going on out there! I need links to click on! I need to know people’s opinions, and read their blogs. I need you to talk to me and validate that I am here and a person participating! I can’t watch a video on YouTube, or iTunes or Blip.tv. I can’t download Lost Season 4 so I am ready to go in Jan for Season 5. I can’t search Google to get the phone number of the closest Grocery store to see if they are open and with power.

The TV part is what I am even more ashamed of being in withdrawals of, but I rationalize that I have been watching TV since i was born! I am of that generation that the TV raised me, it is my friend, companion, and my source of information sometimes. So, what do I miss the most in TV? It seems silly but it’s the shows I watch every day! the Daily show, Family Guy, Seinfeld, and the NEWS. Luckily it’s Christmas time so I am not missing my regular shows since they are in repeats until Jan.

But again, not having the news via TV or internet, is another example of realizing what I take for granted. I am news starved right now! what is going on in our surrounding towns? What is the progress of restoring the power? What is the weather forecast? For National news I can get bits and pieces from Twitter on my Blackberry, but it’s far from comprehensive, and like I said, I can’t click on links to read more, too low signal here in the woods.

When I chose to live here, not once did I think about the possibility of losing power for days or weeks (please not weeks). Or that I would not be able to get out of our driveway in snow storms. Thank God we made sure the generator came with the house! At least we have power to run our pump and have lights and power to play games on the computer. The wood stove is providing plenty of heat, and hubby had the foresight to make sure we had plenty of wood for the winter.

I guess my point here is that because of my addiction to all things internet and TV, I feel completely depressed and paralyzed. On top of the regular Seasonal Affected Disorder (Winter, shorter days, holidays). I can barely get out of bed, do household chores and play with the children. I am mad at myself for not embracing this time to grow closer as a family or get things done around the house. But I just can’t! It is a very strange and an uncomfortable feeling and I stress to you to be thankful and aware of your modern media consumption.

Image by ClintJCL via Flickr

Bands/Artists I have seen perform:

Recently I was in the car riding home from our vacation in Deer Isle, ME.  It is a 5+ hour ride and I decided to start listing on my Blackberry all the concerts I have seen over the years.  After racking my brain to remember some of those concerts, since I was probably under some sort of influence when I saw them, I turned on the Sirius in the car and started scanning channels for artists to see if it sparked anything I had forgotten.

So here is my list, I am sure it is missing some.  I only chose national acts to list. No particular order.

• The Cramps
• Stereo MCs James
• Book of Love
• Lou Reed
• John Doe
• Jon Spenser Blues Explosion
• Fugazi
• Seal
• Ween
• Yes
• Eddie Vedder
• Tom Petty
• Steve Winwood
• REM
• 10,000 Maniacs
• The Kinks
• The Smithereens
• Lee Rocker
• New Order
• Prince
• Erasure
• Adam Ant
• Who
• Live (7 times)
• Janes Addiction
• Pearl Jam (5 times)
• Nirvana
• Collective Soul (5 times)
• The Cure
• B52s
• Blondie
• Talking Heads
• Beastie Boys
• Echo and the Bunnynen
• Stone Temple Pilots
• Black Crows
• Squeeze
• Crowded House
• Living Color (2 times)
• Social Distortion
• Roxy Music
• Tom Tom Club
• Bryan Ferry
• Thompson Twins
• Til Tuesday
• Peter Gabriel (5 times)
• Genesis
• U2
• J Geils Band (2 times)
• The Cult
• Lenny Kravitz (2 times)
• Public Image Ltd
• Big Audio Dynamite
• Sinead O’Connor
• Madonna
• The Godfathers
• Camper Van Beethoven
• Ministry
• Kiss (2 times)
• Nine Inch Nails
• The Pretenders
• Iggy Pop
• The Tubes
• Goo Goo Dolls
• Sheryl Crow
• Pink Floyd
• Beach Boys
• Siouxie & the Banshees
• Rollins Band
• Violent Femmes
• Ice-T & Body count
• Butthole Surfers
• The Ramones
• Rickie Lee Jones
• David Bowie
• Lucious Jackson
• The Killers
• The Monkees
• Steve Winwood
• Jeff Buckley
• Psychedelic Furs
• Fiona Apple
• L7
• Chris Isaak
• The Tragically Hip

Bands/Artists I hope to see before it’s too late:

• The Rolling Stones
• BB King
• Foo Fighters
• Red Hot Chili Peppers
• AC/DC
• Led Zeppelin
• Stevie Wonder
• Elvis Costello
• Neil Young
• Elton John
• Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young
• Green Day
• Tina Turner
• No Doubt
• Sonic Youth
• Jethro Tull
• Liz Phair
• The Smashing Pumpkins
• Bjork
• The White Stripes
• Rage Against the Machine
• Devo
• The Police
• George Michael
• Eurythmics
• Cake
• Heart
• Joe Jackson
• Portishead
• The Raconteurs

I obviously have many more concerts to attend, so I better start saving my dollars now.  What concerts have I not seen that I should add to my list?

So you might ask out off all those artists I have seen, who was the best?  Well I can tell you that there are many, and most of the repeat concerts are my favorites. But getting to see Roxy Music, Talking Heads, & U2, to name a few, I will always be greatful.

Music is so important in life, it evokes a feeling, a memory,  a sense of belonging in the world, bringing people together all over the earth.   And I am always in awe of how talented musicians are and wish I had even an inkling of that talent and gift.

So to quote Neil Young, “Keep on rockin’ in the free world”!

OK my first blog.  I have been threatening myself  for a while now saying I was going to start one.  Convincing myself that I have something to say, just like everyone else.  And if no one reads it, that is fine too.  It is just out there in the atmosphere, like exhaling.

So being a middle-aged Mom that just moved once again, it’s a significant challenge  to meet and keep new girlfriends.  I don’t know what it is, but there is an inherent need to have girlfriends.  Someone who knows what it’s like to deal with a husband, childbirth, periods, and being a mom.

I got lucky.  I met someone at Blake’s soccer game, who had the same age kids as me, had just moved to our town like us, and was fun to be around. And so the cultivation of the friendship began.  Starting with play dates for the kids, then progressing to going out and doing things together like going out for drinks, movies, shopping at Target.  Then she organized a night out with “the girls” with her other new friend and I.  We went to a Chinese restaurant and they had karaoke.  We had a good time and all got along great.  I was psyched because I was hoping I could now add another girlfriend to my arsenal.

But I must confess that there is a certain dynamic among women when there are 3 together.  I have experienced this in many different forms since I was in grade school.  There is an underlying struggle going on.  Questions start racing through your mind; “does she like her more than me?”, “I don’t get that joke between them, what is that?”, “why do I have to sit in the backseat?”.  Now it might seem silly or paranoid, but it is real.  Women compete with each other not even realizing they are doing it.

Back to the story.  I ask my girlfriend to go see a girl movie with me.  She says sure.  As I am relaying my excitement for getting out of the house to go see this girl movie, it is revealed, several days after the fact that she already saw the movie with the “other” friend.  She tries to quickly diffuse the situation by saying “you were in Boston or something that night and I just had to go see it.”   Silence on my end. The same thing happened on Mother’s Day.   I am hurt, upset, angry, frustrated, and now trying to decide how to deal with those emotions. Do I forget it?  Do I bring it up? Do I act standoffiish for a while?  Life is hard enough and I just want my girlfriend relationships to be as un-drama filled as possible.